By Rachael Espinet Saturday, June 8 2013
Tricia
St John, survivor of domestic violence, has pleaded with women, to
recognise the signs of domestic violence and leave the relationship,
immediately.
St John’s left hand and right
hand fingers were severed by her common-law husband after a heated
fight. St John had experienced many years of abuse from the hands of
Horace Jackson, who was convicted. Unlike Rehanna Ali, who was found
chopped to death in her Siparia home on Tuesday, St John survived the
assault, and lived to warn other women against domestic abuse.
“You need to recognise the signs of abuse, and get out immediately. If he hits you once, you should get out. From the very first instance there is verbal abuse and hitting, the woman needs to get out,” St John said.
She said if a man tries to isolate a woman, keep her away from her family and friends, that is a sign of abuse. If he stops her from working or shows up to her work place every day to walk her from work, that is the beginning of the isolation process, and she should walk away.
She said if a man tells her “If you leave me I would kill you!” he means it.
“Don’t take it lightly. Don’t think he is joking. He means he will kill you, and that is sadly what happened to her (Rehanna Ali),” she said.
St John also encouraged women to go seek help if they are in an abusive relationship. She described a moment when she was in the police station and the officer on duty told her that it was time for her to go home. She said she had nowhere to go, so she stayed the night in the station until the next on duty officer came in. That officer took St John to a women’s shelter.
“Get in the station and make a report. They would take you to a safe house,” she said. St John said the police would help the battered woman, but she must seek help.
She further said that it is very hard for a woman to leave her abuser for many different factors which include dependence on her abuser, low self-esteem her abuser would have made her feel, and pride may stop the women from leaving the home.
St John encourages the family members of victims of abuse to be supportive and not place blame on the victim. She said this lack of support would cause the woman to return to her abuser.
She also said the community needs to pay more attention to what is going on with their neighbours, and take action if they know someone is being abused.
She encourages people to call the police, take the woman to the hospital, and do what they can to help the woman.
Tara Ramoutar, head of the Caribbean Association for Feminist Research and Action in Trinidad and Tobago (CAFRA TT), agreed with St John, stating that “Domestic violence is not just man and woman business. Domestic violence is everybody’s business.”
She said the country does not take domestic violence seriously, especially the State. She said women take out protective orders, but there is no enforcement for the orders, but the police claim they do not have the resources.
She explained that domestic violence was a high cost on the State. The medical costs in the hospitals as well as the cost to prosecute, and incarcerate the abuser, when the victim is murdered, are a high toll on the State.
Opposition Senator Nafeesa Mohammed said there are major flaws in the way the State approaches domestic violence. She said the Domestic Violence Act of 1999, treats domestic violence like a “quasi-crime” instead of treating it like a full criminal offence.
“Domestic violence should be treated like a criminal act. It could become a criminal matter and it would be considered battery or assault.”
She said the problem is people do not take domestic violence seriously, and said there needs to be a full change in how the country approaches domestic violence.
“You need to recognise the signs of abuse, and get out immediately. If he hits you once, you should get out. From the very first instance there is verbal abuse and hitting, the woman needs to get out,” St John said.
She said if a man tries to isolate a woman, keep her away from her family and friends, that is a sign of abuse. If he stops her from working or shows up to her work place every day to walk her from work, that is the beginning of the isolation process, and she should walk away.
She said if a man tells her “If you leave me I would kill you!” he means it.
“Don’t take it lightly. Don’t think he is joking. He means he will kill you, and that is sadly what happened to her (Rehanna Ali),” she said.
St John also encouraged women to go seek help if they are in an abusive relationship. She described a moment when she was in the police station and the officer on duty told her that it was time for her to go home. She said she had nowhere to go, so she stayed the night in the station until the next on duty officer came in. That officer took St John to a women’s shelter.
“Get in the station and make a report. They would take you to a safe house,” she said. St John said the police would help the battered woman, but she must seek help.
She further said that it is very hard for a woman to leave her abuser for many different factors which include dependence on her abuser, low self-esteem her abuser would have made her feel, and pride may stop the women from leaving the home.
St John encourages the family members of victims of abuse to be supportive and not place blame on the victim. She said this lack of support would cause the woman to return to her abuser.
She also said the community needs to pay more attention to what is going on with their neighbours, and take action if they know someone is being abused.
She encourages people to call the police, take the woman to the hospital, and do what they can to help the woman.
Tara Ramoutar, head of the Caribbean Association for Feminist Research and Action in Trinidad and Tobago (CAFRA TT), agreed with St John, stating that “Domestic violence is not just man and woman business. Domestic violence is everybody’s business.”
She said the country does not take domestic violence seriously, especially the State. She said women take out protective orders, but there is no enforcement for the orders, but the police claim they do not have the resources.
She explained that domestic violence was a high cost on the State. The medical costs in the hospitals as well as the cost to prosecute, and incarcerate the abuser, when the victim is murdered, are a high toll on the State.
Opposition Senator Nafeesa Mohammed said there are major flaws in the way the State approaches domestic violence. She said the Domestic Violence Act of 1999, treats domestic violence like a “quasi-crime” instead of treating it like a full criminal offence.
“Domestic violence should be treated like a criminal act. It could become a criminal matter and it would be considered battery or assault.”
She said the problem is people do not take domestic violence seriously, and said there needs to be a full change in how the country approaches domestic violence.
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